Dating a young woman with kids
First of all, understand that very few Japanese women are interested in dating men of other races. Of course, if you hang around in gaijin bars, then yeah, you’ll meet the one-percent of “Japanese chicks who study English.” And they’ll come equipped with tons of stereotypical ideas about white, black, and miscellaneous brown people. Don’t forget to mention your manga collection and the fact you’re a yellow belt in karate. So when you initially meet someone new, you’re already pre-defined as “a foreigner,” someone whose skin color, clothing, habits, and beliefs places them instantly outside of the social order. Or are you just going to peace out back to Canada and live with your mom after a couple of years? Case in point, I ran in my buddy Tim-Bob the other day, having beers in a gaijin bar.Overcoming the racial stereotypes and just being treated as a normal person is a big barrier. Chicks dig a guy with the ability to smuggle ET to safety. I call him Tim-Bob, because the first time we met, I thought his name was Tim, and the second time I thought his name was Robert. Anyway, Tim-Bob was halfway into his fourth drink and onto a familiar lamentation about his Japanese wife. Your wife can’t make more, since she’s a Japanese woman, but Oh, you sure can. Identical in every way – not exactly fountains of energy and interesting conversation, if you know what I mean.Don’t let her take advantage of you …Unless you want her to - which is fine, but only if you have expectations of a very short relationship.You’ve been on this earth for longer, remember, and you should have learnt by now that you deserve someone who is more impressed by the size of your heart than your wallet.Furthermore, don't presume that you have to “take care” of her emotionally.She’s a woman, not a child, after all - even if she is your daughter’s age. “When I was your age...” “Young people are so ____.” “Oh you weren't even BORN when this album was released.” “You were still a toddler in 1989?
Do be understanding I can get kind of defensive when dating older guys, worried that some might see me as another notch on the bedpost, or fresh meat to pass the time until someone more serious comes along.
From salt-and-pepper George Clooneys to silver-fox Harrison Fords, young women are swooning over smooth older men more than ever.
These days the idea of young women dating older – often significantly older - men barely raises an eyebrow. A long stints in an asylum for the criminally insane? But just because she hasn’t shared a similar experience, don't feel that she wouldn't relate to your life or your issues; open up and you never know what wisdom she could offer.
Don’t worry, she’ll make this quite clear as time goes on. Put enough make-up and hairspray on a soccer ball and it’d look pretty good too. I’ve heard foreign women complain that they can’t meet Japanese men, but eh, I’m not so sure.
And you’ll have kids for sure, because that cements the argument. Japanese people value working ridiculously hard, and they’ll expect you to do the same. Seems like you’d have no problem if you were willing to A) Settle for anything that walks, and B) Plan interesting activities for your loved one to enjoy, do virtually all of the talking, and pretend to find him infinitely fascinating. That’s some of what dating a Japanese woman entails.